Might as well…

Read this: http://www.digitaljournal.com/article/265402

Then this: http://finance.yahoo.com/news/AIG-executive-sentenced-to-4-apf-14168709.html

Discuss.

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Published in: on April 28, 2009 at 7:47 pm  Leave a Comment  

Today’s News You Can Use

Obama signs multi-billion dollar stimulus bill; local liquor merchants rejoice
Can’t think of a better way to spend $400.

Pat Robertson proves he has balls; conservative douchebags set to close pocketbooks
In a surprising move, Pat Robertson has chastised fellow right-wing ignoramus Rush Limbaugh for saying he hopes Barack Obama fails. I wonder how much this is going to cost the 700 Club?

Bristol Palin can’t keep it in her pants
No, that ache you’re feeling in your chest isnt heartburn, its the resurgence of the Palin clan on the national airwaves. Apparently young Bristol and her mother are not on the same page when it comes to abstinence. It’s simply “not realistic.” Oh snap!

Published in: on February 17, 2009 at 5:45 pm  Leave a Comment  

Walmart owns your soul.

A recent survey performed by Zogby Interactive has shown that if American’s were to choose only 1 department store to shop at for the rest of their lives they would choose Walmart. Therefore it is safe to conclude that we now have the Holy Foursome: Father, Son, Holy Ghost, and Walmart.

Target came in a close 2nd, Macy’s in 3rd, with Sears (ew) JCPenny (double-ew) and Kohl’s (gag-me-with-a-spoon) falling in last.

My choice would of course be Bloomies.

Click here for the deets.

Published in: on January 26, 2009 at 2:17 pm  Comments (1)  

jsyk….

inaug1

I’ll be somewhere in the yellow shaded area… Watch for me 😉

Published in: on January 19, 2009 at 9:50 am  Comments (1)  

You’re gonna stick what? in my WHAT!?

A few weeks ago when sister and cousin were visiting, we got the bright idea to go ice skating in Central Park. Yes, it was magical. Central Park is magical anyways..without the snow covered walkways, Christmas music playing and overall holiday cheer. Throughout most of the experience I would have told anyone it’s worth the wait in line and $25- that is, until I decided to go one more lap around the rink.

I was a regular Tonya Harding. Gliding blissfully, swinging my arms back and forth without a care in the world. The girls were too busy putting “thought” into the act of ice skating that they spent most of their time ice stomping rather than ice skating. I continuously mocked them as I lapped them until they decided they were “over it” and I made the decision to go a few more rounds. After two laps I considered taking of my skates- No, I thought, let’s go one more!

A decision I will  regret for a while. I was barely into the next lap when I hit what can only be described as a ravine (albeit small) in the ice. I went down…hard. The right knee went straight into the ice and my forehead as well. I had seen people falling all day, but generally you know you are going down and have time to add a bit of grace to your landing. I did not. I knew it was ugly based on the resounding chorus of “ooooooo’s” that followed. I gathered my composure (and what was left of my dignity) and hobbled over to the exit… and the girls.

Thank God they did not see me, I did not need that kind of humiliation in my life. As the day progressed the knee swelled to the size of a grapefruit and became unbendable (sp?). After a few days and several thousand milligrams of ibuprofen, the swelling was almost completely gone and the knee was once again functioning. It was still sore, which I attributed to the massive trauma it had received in the injury. I figured a few more days and everything would be peachy.

I woke up Tuesday morning to the knee fully swollen and once again unbendable(starting to like this word). When I attempted to bend it, it felt as if my kneecap was pressing against my skin and ready to pop out. Realizing that the knee is nothing to fool around with, I decided to see a doctor immediately. When he first looked at it he mumbled something to me that sounded like “blaaaablaaatendonblaaablaa.” Then ordered x-rays. X-rays came back normal; his concern moved to a possible infection and therefore subscribed me an antibiotic and an anti-inflammatory.

The words that followed sent shivers down my spine. “Come back and see me in 5 days and if the swelling isn’t gone we will have to stick a needle in it.” Wait a minute…WHAT?! I’m not sure theres room for a needle in a persons knee, where does it go?? I spent the next half hour feeling around and no, that is not a possibility. I have chicken legs for Christ sake!! This cannot be good…

Was my “magical” afternoon in Central Park worth it? I think not. $25 to skate + $25 office copay + $20 Rx medications = $70 (thus far) on top of the actual injured knee.

I blame the girls. For sucking on the ice so bad that I was forced to show them how it’s really done. Enjoy your healthy joints..skanks.

Published in: on January 10, 2009 at 4:10 pm  Comments (2)  

What does one wear…

To a presidential inauguration?

I ask because ole’ NFB has landed himself two tickets to the inauguration! Out of thousands of requests in my congressional district I was one of the 50 names chosen to recieve a ticket for myself and a guest. Kings to me!

Obviously I am as giddy as a schoolgirl. I’m thinking I should probably wear something that will properly display my enthusiasm and excitement to be present during this historic moment. Therefore I was considering…

banana

Published in: on January 5, 2009 at 5:49 pm  Comments (2)